1. Corgis are in 62% of all photos of real-life animals posing with stuffed animal versions of themselves.
2. Corgis are influential stretchers.
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3. Corgis are major influencers in the Halloween industry.
4. They’re also the ones who actually invented the popular internet meme called “breading.”
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5. Have I mentioned all of the lives they have saved this year? Hundreds.
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6. They’re responsible for one-twelfth of this year’s American lobster trade.
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7. Corgis are great at policing. Unlike human officers, corgis stay rational. They also wear bow ties.
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8. Corgis are poised to make their biggest impact at next year’s Olympic games. A record three corgis are going to compete in downhill skiing.
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9. For you breeders, corgis are advocates for playground safety.
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10. They’re master impressionists.
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11. And will also drive you home when you’ve had too much to drink.
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12. Politically, corgis have made great in progress in inter-dog communication.
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13. They’ve basically brought great peace to the dog world.
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14. They can rap.
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15. They will literally sit in your mailbox and fetch your mail.
16. They’re also just cool. I know that’s shallow, but hey, it’s a fact.
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17. Have a bunch of balloons? No problem! Corgis are great at guarding them.
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18. And they defy all laws of gravity.
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19. And some corgis, not all, are great personal shoppers. A growing industry in Corgi Nation.
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20. Also, can you imagine a world without CORGI PUPPIES?
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21. A world without corgi puppies is like a world without oxygen.
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22. I CAN’T EVEN BREATHE AT THE THOUGHT.
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23. We would all basically die.
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24. Humankind would cease to exist.
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25. We would all go to hell and live in a constant, never-ending nightmare.
26. Because THERE WOULD BE NO CORGI PUPPIES IN HELL.
27. In conclusion, SAVE THE CORGIS.
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28. DO IT FOR THE CHILDREN (OR JUST FOR YOURSELF IF YOU’RE SELFISH LIKE ME).
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