1. They just aren’t cute as puppies.

2. Nope. Still not cute.

3. So they’ll never look out for your tiny human. Forget it.

4. Tom Cruise will end your friendship. These boys are the new Kings of RayBans.

5. They’ll never look cool in your car.

6. Stone-aged animals, they haven’t a clue about social media or selfies.

7. They have NO sense of humor:

8. They’ll NEVER even try to understand you.

9. Nope. No effort at all.

10. They HATE cats and will NEVER cuddle up to your cat for warmth.

11. Your home will be filthy – you’ll NEVER catch them taking a bath.

12. Their smiles are the scariest thing you can possibly see:

13. They’ll make you look way too uncool by comparison:

14. They’re always sleeping in late:

15. They’re always ruining serious pictures:

16. They’ll make your Halloween costume look terrible by comparison:

17. They take up all the space on the couch:

18. Basically, they’re TERRIFYING. Who would ever want one?

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